Somehow in my mind, these boys never age. They are still the cutie pie little babies I met on the street. (Don't tell them I said that! They scream every time I call them babies!!!) Ok, they were never babies since I have known them, but they were considerably smaller.
Recently, it has been like I have woken up from a really long nap and seen them for the first time in years and I don't like it. The other night, one of the boys was standing in my room asking for something and as I was looking at him, it was like I hadn't been seeing him for the last 7 months. I suddenly realized he was growing up and definitely was not the small boy I picked from the streets 3 years ago! He had muscles and lost all of his baby fat. He was taller than I remembered and doesn't look like a kid anymore. UGH!!! What happened???
Anyone know how to keep their kids from growing up????
Yesterday at church, I was looking at a guy that was sitting next to one of the boys but his head was down. I was wondering who it was and then realized it was one of the boys. He was dressed really nicely, dress pants and a button down shirt, and as he got up to tell the church all of the ways he was thankful to God, I wondered what happened to him. He was suddenly much taller and way more grown up than I remembered. I almost started crying in church.
I realized that the time I have left with some of these boys is so short. Soon, they will want to start life on their own and will move out. One boy already has, but I wonder what will happen when they all do. That is the goal, to have them all out in the world on their own, but the reality of it has been setting in. Quickly!
When we got home from church, I told him that he looked so grown up and what happened to my little baby. He laughed and said he wasn't a baby but he would always be mine.
Heart officially melted.
I worry about if these boys are learning enough and are going to be ready to enter the real world. When the same boy got up at church to thank God, I was a little worried because it didn't sound like thanksgivings. But as he continued to talk, I think I beamed with pride. He has grown up and changed so much. We still have a ways to go, but I know if he had to leave home tomorrow, I know he would be fine. They will all be fine.
At church he told how he had to go back to his village because his grandmother was sick. He told how he found out that he had lost 2 people while he has been gone, his uncle and his other grandparent. He said he couldn't cry though because he wasn't sad. He said that they believed in God and he knew that they were in a better place now, where they weren't suffering anymore. He said that he knew that they were now happy, so he was happy. He also cautioned the whole church that while we were all in the city enjoying life, our family in the village might be suffering and we should take the time to visit before it was too late.
Maybe growing up isn't so bad after all...